Preserved in my memories,

The fears I buried – 

So neatly, So deeply – 

Are now embedding their claws

Ruthlessly in my spine….

My bad;

I sowed them in my soul

And watered, with my tears. 


 But now

 I just crouch in a corner, 

Waiting to face the dire consequences.

 

So bleak;

Yet, this darkness holds

All the locked away secrets of light. 

So silent ;

Yet, this breeze 

Sings a melancholy, so piercing, 

Even A hundred icicles 

Penetrating my flesh

Would feel like a cushioned blow. 


I can feel the demon, 

Breathing on my shoulder;

Chilling my spine with frost. 


A whisper, so cold, so fatal;

“Don’t move;

For, I will capture you

Even before the fear gets hold of your mind. 

Don’t breathe;

For, your chest is already bursting

from the confinement of endless traumas 

and a million painful secrets. 

So, let go, now;

For, You could never understood 

Any of this, anyway.

It’s A maze, you can’t solve. 


Sun’s lazy rays 

Won’t reach you, at any rate;

For, it has dozed off, now. 


But,

You don’t have to lament 

This pathetic life. 

It hurts,  

And I understand. 

But I promise, 

This would be the last time. 


Give in now, sweetheart, 

For, I’ll show you a paradise 

Away from here;

Frozen Time, Still Life. 

Oh, a place so sweet, 

That you’d  forget

This realm of misery. 


Oh, let me caress your cheeks, 

And kiss your warm hands; 

Let me fill your empty vessel

With burning ice. 

Because I can see, 

How insufficient the fire was.”


Inevitably, I feel The devil dance on my chest;

I feel The air leave my lungs 

And never return,

Making me realize, 

I never wanted it, anyway. 


The winter was not coming;

It was already celebrating its arrival. 


                                            – JAISMINE K.

my helpless protest

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